Impending Baby Logic

1. Empty the terrifying contents of a closet you haven’t looked at since Nancy Pelosi was Speaker of the House.

2. Debate whether the room should be purple, yellow, green, or light blue.

3. Move what is currently the Guest Bed but will become the Big Girl Bed after it gets painted to a different corner of what will be the nursery.

4. Move the Long Changing Table out of current child’s room and into the nursery. Express amendment that it fits.

5. Move all the Big Girl Furniture into current child’s room. But not the Big Girl Bed, for above reasons.

6. Sort and label 8 bins of mixed-sex baby clothes.

7. Haul 8 bins of mixed-sex baby clothes up two flights of stairs to put in the nursery closet.

8. Ignore the fact that in three months, 4 of those bins will need to cone out and go somewhere else.

9. Stare at the new piles of unsorted mishmash.

10. Order a pizza and watch Wolf of Wall Street.